Posts Tagged ‘store clerk’
On Day 14 I ran some errands in town and had some interactions with several store clerks. The first was a clerk that I had seen many times before. She seemed distraught and came off as very unfriendly. My reaction, however was not to assume this was somehow a reflection on myself (like I would have in the past), but rather to be concerned for her. I knew that something was bothering her. Who knows? She could be battling some serious illness or facing some other problem or loss. I encountered another store clerk at Walmart that seemed to be walking-on-the-clouds happy. This second clerk was all smiles and friendly to everybody. Made me think that if this person could be that happy working a job like that, then I have no excuse! Somehow, however, I would bet this second store clerk will get promoted or move on to a higher position.
Since the last day was part of a family trip, I thought I would include the whole weekend in this final update. Our first day of the trip involved travel and stay at a hotel. The hotel clerks at Days Inn gave me a smile even before I could give them one! It was a fun night of swimming and hanging out with the family.
The next morning, I spoke with a few people and the hotel night manager at breakfast in the lobby. They were all cheerful and I think the manager appreciated a friendly smile and compliment. It is easy for people on vacation to smile back at you.
We then drove on to our destination of the people our in-laws. And now the challenge would begin. One of the people we were visiting has, in the past, said things to me that were somewhat critical and even upsetting . So I was a bit worried about this. In fact, I was so stressed out about making this visit that I had stress-related headaches for two days straight before departing on our trip! I would like to say that my smiling just cured everything. But the smile back principle didn’t seem to work here. Yet, somehow this time things turned out OK and unlike other times, I did not feel insulted. Just like with the first checkout lady mentioned in the top paragraph, I began to empathize with this in-law. This was not my problem. And the only thing that I need worry about is my own behavior.
Smile, be considerate, have good manners – if that does not work, then you at least know you tried your best and you can then come to the realization that perhaps the other person is dealing with many of their own struggles. If nothing else, you brightened up that person’s day in some small way.
On this day, I took a trip into town to take my youngest son in for gymnastics while I stopped at a few stores. Once again, I found the store clerks to be very responsive to smiles. And once again, the older lady at the Walmart I stopped at seemed to absolutely love being greeted by name, with a smile. So if you want to make some store clerks day, try this!
My wife was very tired when she got home and not too responsive to much of anything. She was up most of the night with my youngest daughter and then had to take her in for a minor surgery very early. The only thing she wanted to do was get to bed and catch up on her sleep! Moral of the story: Don’t expect dog-tired people to be too cheerful. I know I wouldn’t be too cheerful if I were that tired.
I stopped by our nearby small town auto parts store today. This store is owned by perhaps the most unsmiley person on the face of the earth! There was even a time once where this owner’s unfriendly behavior (and unwillingness to serve me) caused me to leave the store. So this would be the acid test. Would smiling work? I noticed that another fellow was also working, I think it was the owner’s son. Fortunately, however, I got “Mr. Unsmiley” to serve me. He found the small part I needed and literally tossed it across the counter, almost like he was angry about selling it (no kidding)! I persisted in smiles and we struck up a little conversation about the possible problem in my vehicle. I then thanked him for the good service with a big smile. And you know what? He smiled back! I think this was the first time ever I had seen him smile! The Smile Back Principle worked! What this made me realize also was
If you are smiling, it will be easier to find something complimentary to say. And if you find something complimentary to say, you will find it easier to smile.
I also visited the local grocery store. The checkout clerk (younger fellow) seemed more than happy to joke around after I greeted him with a smile and a joking comment about a product at the checkout. I think people in this type of job greatly appreciate a smile.
On this day, I was treated to a day of job in-service. This is where you listen to speakers all day long. Honestly, there are a lot of eyes glazed over on such days. But, this provided me some unique opportunities with this experiment. I was able to get some smiling in at our table, and several employees I never met before seemed to respond positively. I think what was more groundbreaking was that I was included in a group of coworkers going out to lunch – in fact it seemed like they really wanted me along. I say this is groundbreaking because I have, in the past, been conveniently excluded from such outings – and frankly, that was kind of tough to take! But I have, through this experiment, learned that
People like to be around smiling upbeat people and will avoid mopey negative people. If you want to be included, smile. It is almost impossible to be mopey and negative while you smile!
On the way home, I stopped at a store and the checkout lady seemed to be in quite a somber mood. As I departed, I answered her very subdued “Thank you and have a good day” with a big smile and my own “Thank you”. It was as if someone flipped a switch – this lady just lit up with a big smile in return.
I tried something new this day. I recently read that people loved to hear their name. So when I stopped at the store, in addition to smiling I greeted workers by name (since they always wore name badges). The reaction was, for the most part, very positive. A few seemed a bit surprised, but others seemed very pleased to receive such a warm and personalized greeting. Using the name in such a way, along with a smile, seems to advance the relationship from that of strangers to one of casual acquaintances. I also made a point to use my coworker’s names when I could – it is difficult to know if it made any appreciable difference, but I fairly sure it did not hurt any. I didn’t overdo it by the way. I only used their name once. I think if one repeated the other person’s name many times it could make them suspicious or nervous.
A very good friend of mine stopped by in the evening. I would almost call him a best friend. I smiled a bit, but not always. And to be honest it did not seem to matter that much. I have recently come to realize something about really good friends:
Really good friends won’t like you any more if you smile. But they won’t like you any less if you don’t smile.
In other words, really good friends will be there for you even if you are a bit down and out. So if you are fortunate enough to have such a friend, be very thankful.
On this day I paid a visit to our local rural grocery store and hardware store. I don’t know what it is about this grocery store, but it tends to be about the “un-smiliest” place I can think of, short of perhaps a waiting room in a doctor’s office. There is one clerk at this store that will rarely smile at me, nor greet me, and I have been visiting this store for over 15 years! And even the manager can be that same way! I have come very close to confronting the owner on this issue in the past, but I figured that perhaps I was not trying too hard myself (and now I think that indeed that this was the case). At any rate, there were some new, younger, staff working this Saturday afternoon and they also had somber expressions. I put on the smiles at most everyone. One middle aged woman customer kept looking back at me, wondering what I was up to, although I was trying not to look too goofy. But then something kind of neat happened – the clerk broke into a joking mood and several of the employees joined in. Smiles all around! In fact, it was to the point where my father-in-law, who came with me, commented on what “a smiley bunch this was”. My father-in-law, like everyone else, does not know I am conducting this experiment. So I guess this day taught me that
smiles, given away in abundance, can even get un-smiley people to smile back.
In summary, to get a smile, you must often first give a smile. Call it the Smile Back Principle.
Otherwise this day, I visited the local hardware store, which is always filled with smiles. There are at least two very nice, very friendly, joking, fellows working there – I think this always creates a pleasant atmosphere for everyone working and shopping there. I always enjoy visiting this store. Smiles were returned but generally smiles are always returned here so it was difficult to notice any difference.
No big events at the home front. My wife smiled her beautiful smile back at me, as usual. 
On this day, I had an opportunity to interact with two store clerks, an eye doctor, and an eye glasses specialist at Lens Crafters. The first store clerk I encountered seemed somewhat unaffected by any smiling on my part. But then, as I was leaving, she returned a smile to one of her coworkers – maybe a delayed reaction? My eye doctor seemed impervious to just about anything. Smiles, grimaces, jokes, suggestions – nothing seemed to break through to his private world of eyes – I guess that is how it can be with highly focused and trained professionals. The glasses guy – that was another story entirely. He seemed to be waiting for someone to break a smile and break the ice – we joked and laughed a bit about my boring taste in glasses. I told him that if I became rich I would be back for another more stylish pair to wear at speaking engagements!
More interactions with my students revealed that students tend to laugh at your jokes a bit better if you can prime them with some smiles. Perhaps that is why my attempts at jokes in the past fell flat?
Later, I picked up some motor oil at a car parts store. The clerk seemed to be a step ahead of me. He was about the friendliest, most helpful clerk I have ever encountered in such a store! Without a doubt, it would make me want to go back to this store. His smiles were there for each and every customer I am quite sure.
